Have you ever felt excited to start a new habit? Like working out, journaling, or eating healthier—only to lose motivation a few days or weeks later? You’re not lazy or broken. You’re just human.
In fact, starting a new habit feels hard because your brain is wired to resist change, even when the change is good for you.
🧠 THE BRAIN’S ROLE IN RESISTING CHANGE
The brain sees anything new or uncertain as a potential threat. It kicks in fear, doubt, procrastination, or distraction to protect us from failure, embarrassment, or pain.
This is your brain saying, “Hey, better stick with what we know. It’s safer here.”
Common Forms of Inner Resistance:
- Procrastination
- Overthinking
- Needing it to be “perfect” before you begin
- Telling yourself, “I’m not ready yet”
- Getting distracted with small, less important tasks
In other words, the RESISTANCE you feel is actually coming from old versions of you that don’t want to change. As mentioned earlier, brain’s main focus is to keep us safe, alive, in our comfort zone. Naturally, it wants us to stay the same, for nothing to change because this creates some uncertainty and possible risk. When the change comes, this is where our ego kicks in and where the resistance is born. It is a very natural reaction to change and in this moments we always find excuses, very justifiable ones. 🙂
A Real-Life Example of Resistance
Observe the difference: Both persons are the same age, have children and busy work schedule. Both of them want to loose weight. One person comes with excuses like; complications at work then the next time a child is sick and so on. But, when you look at another person, all the same things happened to them but still they did that workout.
5 Ways to Overcome Resistance and Stay Consistent:
1. RECOGNIZE
For example, you want to start a Blog for the first time. You have good ideas but you just never get to it because of the resistance that is holding you back. You want to start going to the gym regularly , but something always gets in the way, and you procrastinate…
First, recognize that resistance is just resistance—and it will show up again and again.
2. DISCOVER
When something keeps pulling you away from your plan, pause and ask yourself: Why is the resistance stronger here than in other areas? Is it because this feels more uncomfortable, unfamiliar, or uncertain?
For example, you want to start with that Blog but something just suddenly happens and there is no time for it. On the other hand, you’ve started going to the gym and that feels much easier to stick with. This shows that the stronger resistance lies with starting the blog—likely because it feels more uncertain, exposed, or uncomfortable.
3. UNDERSTAND
Understand that resistance is natural. Our brain just wants for everything to stay the same. Don’t beat yourself up, try to do the first step anyway.
4. KINDNESS
Making peace with our inner resistance. It helps us to get to know ourselves better. You can use this affirmation “I am facing that aspect of myself with love”.
5. EDUCATE
When we deepen our understanding of resistance—why we make excuses or constantly procrastinate, we gain the power to consciously reprogram our path toward the goals we truly want to achieve. Otherwise, we remain stuck in unconscious patterns, reacting to unexpected situations and using them as reasons to give up.
I hope this has helped you to understand why it is so hard to start with something new and what that resistance is telling us. We don’t want to give up on our ‘story’ because of that resistance. This is also the way to get to know ourselves on a deeper level.
A Journal Exercise to Befriend Resistance
Write down a letter to yourself or journal your ideas and aspirations. Now feel that resistance and ask: “Do you feel fear?, Do you have any suggestion?, Hey, I know you’re trying to keep me safe. But I’ve got this.” Have a honest conversation with your resistance. It is almost like you are becoming a friend with it, with that other version of yourself.
That resistance? It’s a sign you’re on the edge of growth. It means the thing you’re trying to do matters. If it didn’t, your brain wouldn’t care.
If you want to read more about how to get back control over your life, click here.
Light & Love,
Romy
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